the pit stop

there are things that when they're done, they're just done. no going back. This is the reason for this blog. Just last night, I was surprised by the sudden surge of fate that came across my life. My recent ex texted me letting me know his new number. At first, I even didn't bother to save that number. But because of some reason, I went back to my phone inbox, opened the message and saved the number. I replied, saying "orayt" and nothing else. Then he replied and that's where the story began. It was a frustrating night because i was honestly pissed off. The flow of the conversation is leading me to the pit stop (again) and with this, i know i will be (once again) the villain. And so it happened. He told me that he's just waiting for my answer. i answered all his questions, I told him what he needed to hear. Coz honestly, he can't just undo what he did. Actually when i have the chance to reminisce (i know this is the positive term,,i can't think of the negative one), all my disappointments are surging in. It'll end up I don't want to think about it again. I just don't think that I'm already over (to what happened...ok?.coz i'm totally over that). I can feel all the pain again, how that event in my life ruined my personality, my self-esteem, myself. I don't wanna go back to that pit of fire. Coz i want to rebuild myself (and thank God someone's there to help me rebuild my damaged self).