..wish list..

wish list for myself (including long run wants)
.the books that i want to buy
.DSLR
.rubik's cube (original 3x3 and 5x5)

countries i want to visit:
.france
.singapore
.japan
.korea
.guatemala (for Xela!.hehe)
.italy (?)
.india or nepal! (love the bags here)

..soon, i'll add things here :)

spent some time in my paradise

on my way going home, i decided to spend some time alone in my paradise...and that's National Bookstore!. just like walking alone to places I really don't know, this is one of the best things that I love to do. Just browsing through some books that I love (and hopefully, have one copy each), I feel so serene...so heavenly. Well, I just love books that much that's why one of the most visited places for me in a mall is a bookstore..just the mere scene of many shelves full of books makes me want to stay for few hours (yeah..only if I have the luxury to stay there for hours, I will!). And the usual spots: fiction, sci-fi and fantasy, classics, acad books like history and econ, and philosophy (and other practices). Just imagine what i look like while walking and looking at the books that I love like Othello in classics, Time Traveler's Wife, Winner Stands Alone, The God of Small Things, Umberto Eco's books in fiction, and Spiderwick Chronicles in fantasy. Geez, every negativity left my body!. Sad to say, photography books were sealed so I was not able to browse even few pages. O well, aside from coffee shop and hardware (or furniture shop), bookstore gives me peace. I swear! My paradise...Ooooh, I forgot to visit one of my fave corners in a bookstore: the art corner. I love to look at different paint brushes and paints. As for the canvas, I really don't have to buy one coz it's really easy to make. Anyway, going back...there are really lots of books that I want to buy. Better start collecting them now (now that i still have work!.haha) One of these days, I will again visit my paradise. Especially after a very stressful shift! :)

unexpected things really do surprise you (that's why they're called unexpected..haha)

procrastinating...maybe.,but i still don't know.,there are some things in my life that i want to wipe out.,i was in the process of reflecting last night.,a deep one as i can say.,i don't know but there are things in my life that i don't understand.,then he said, stop blaming yourself.,he's correct.,maybe,not every negative thing or event that happens in my life is really my fault.,i was surprised (his reactions were unexpected),,i'm lucky he's like that.,we talked seriously last night about the questions that need to be answered.,he explained some things to me.,this is one of the reasons why i love him so much.,he understands me as much as he could.,and i do love him for that.,i'm attached...i know that.,now i can say that this is it.,the go signal is on.,no turning back now.,because i also can't turn back now.,i mean, i already let myself be attached to him (though ever since that's the case.,it's different at this moment).,this is the unexpected thing that happened last night.,his reactions were really unexpected.,i didn't cover up things last night.,it's just that,,there are information that are hard to discuss.,or i'm too shy to discuss..i don't know.,i'm like that.,but then, he made me realize he's not just a friend.,i know that.,but still,,,i don't know.,every day, i can feel that i want to be with him more.,but then i know it's not possible.,we have separate lives.,we have our own lives.,we are different people who are in a relationship.,a very deep one.,this is actually the reason why i don't want to be so attached to him.,because i don't like this feeling...